A Care Package from Sweden

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A Care Package from Sweden

Post by Chal » Tue Dec 14, 2004 10:09 PM

I know I come off with some not so funny stories, and sometimes none of you find humor in what I see humor in.

However I must share this...

Tonight we recieved a wonderful care package from Caeryn's family for christmas. In this package was some wonderful chocolates...mmmm! Licorice with a filling in side that melts in your mouth, some chocolate cookies and similiar items.

However there was this one item...

It came in a metal tube about 2 inches in diameter! Had a red cap and blue label. The label showed a child eating a piece of bread with what looked like squeezable peanutbutter. I am thinking oh yeah! Squeezable chocolate spread! We can make squirly cues on our ice cream sundaes, not to mention what we could do if this tube somehow found it's way into our bedroom!

I was making great plans!

Then Caeryn looks at me, holds up tube, and says THIS! THIS! is the greatest stuff on earth! I was getting excited already!
Just wait till we get home and try it! I was squirming in my seat just thinking of the adventures yet to come!!

We get home and he says I am going to let the boy try it first...I am thinking WTF?!! The boy is not getting any of our "Tube O' Fun!" But I try to find the christmas spirit and share, like we all should! I said okay but just a little.

So Caeryn squeezes a little out on a cracker for the boy! I am thinking what a waste! A little can go a long ways if used right!

My son...takes a bite...and runs to the garbage and spits it in the garbage!!! I am laughing, but in my mind I am screaming noooooo! That's a night of heaven you are spitting in the garbage!!!

My son says, ewww it tasted like smoked salmon!!!!

I said smoked salmon?!!! WTF is that? Caeryn looks at me with a big ole grin and says Kaviar!!

ALL MY HOPES AND DREAMS GONE!!! With one ghetto tube of Kaviar!!! Kaviar in a tube!!! I mean geezus! They think americans are freaking weird?!!! Kaviar in a tube!! I showed it to a friend, I asked her if she knew what it was. She says looks like a huge tube of KY Jelly!

It has been an hour since this WONDERFUL tube has infested our home. I see my cat planning Caeryn's death so he can achieve this awesome delight. I expect to walk in tomorrow and see my cat laying on his back on the couch, with a bloated belly, Kaviar and Caeryn's blood all over his body grinning and belching. My life is doomed all because of one tube of Kaviar! /sobs

In the last hour I have named this tube many new things.

3 day hooker in a tube! Thats my favorite! Smells like one anyway!

Anyway that is my sad Christmas story, all because of a fish that laid too many eggs!



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Post by Skewert » Tue Dec 14, 2004 10:15 PM

Amusing story =) and True too?

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Post by Eithindyr » Wed Dec 15, 2004 1:33 AM

I can't believe you don't have tubed Kaviar in the US :P. Just wait until we send you our Surströmming! I'm sure Caeryn can tell you more about it, it reeks so much people have been thrown out of their apartments because of it :D.

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Post by salomeasillverfrost » Wed Dec 15, 2004 8:48 AM

rofl chal , okay I am picturing that one sig picture Caeyn used to use with that guy with all the food around him but this "tube o kaviar" in his hand and the can lurking on a shelf plotting his demise hehe
/hugs to all of you Sal
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Post by Cetra Strife » Thu Dec 16, 2004 9:34 AM

Chal, remember how I used to have sick sick conversations with caeryn, and you used to read them on his comp, and yell at me?

You are marvelously sick and twisted in a sexual way.


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Post by Chal » Fri Dec 17, 2004 10:15 AM


Oh! and Eith please don't show your mom I would die!


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Post by Yenen the wise » Sat Jan 15, 2005 1:49 PM

OMG that is to amusing!!!! LMFAO....

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Post by Chal » Wed Apr 24, 2013 12:57 PM

Wow 12 years later I now eat some of that freaky fish food. This was hilarious to go back and reread. We are still married, very happily and we live in Sweden, still hate the hooker smelling fish eggs in a tube!


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